


The Current Has Us Now

by scottie994



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Drama, F/M, Fluff, Romance, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, lil bit of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:41:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29820948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scottie994/pseuds/scottie994
Summary: In a society where the initials of one's soulmate present themselves as a tattoo, there are those who accept it without a fight, and those who avoid it at all costs. Karin is among the latter.'It's actually concerning how little you notice what's happening around you.'ONE-SHOT: HitsuKarin, Soulmate!AU
Relationships: Hitsugaya Toushirou/Kurosaki Karin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 20





	The Current Has Us Now

Karin laid quite still, despondent as she stared at the ceiling. A bland and unfamiliar room surrounded her, bathed in a yellow glare from the street lights outside, a vision just as ugly as the feel. And there it was again–the discomfort, the disappointment, the absence of belonging. She'd been so sure this time. This man by her side, obnoxious now as he snored, had been so promising.

But not.

For the past several weeks he had been coming into the coffee shop where she worked, a freelance journalist with the luxury of working where he pleased, and the attraction was there. He ordered the same thing each time and stayed for hours, and they bonded. In retrospect, it was a bond that perhaps any two people would form within the safety of a single recurring setting, but she hadn't focused on that. She refused to. Like similar situations before, she knew from the start that it wasn't right. She could feel it deep down inside, but she ignored it, like she always did.

 _It'll be better this time,_ she would tell herself. _It'll work._

Unlike everyone else she knew, she never intended to plan her life around someone she may never find, fate be damned. And so, when this man had asked her that day to go out with him after her shift, she smacked aside the face of logic and said yes. She wasn't the only one who lived their life in spite of the rules, determined to blaze their own path and decide for themselves how and with whom they would spend their lives, and Karin was adamant in her belief that both sides of the coin were valid.

Even when it left her feeling like this.

Deciding to linger no further lest her companion wake and awkward grumbling ensue, Karin extracted herself from the bed, gathered her things from the floor, and slipped out of the room. She dressed in the bathroom across the hall, leaving her uniform button up and skirt dishevelled in haste, fixing her long black hair in a bun on her way out of the apartment.

She rode the elevator down to the main floor, a slow exhale falling from her lips as she hung her head. She ran her fingers along the back of her neck, gently grazing the space just below her hairline, as she so often did. There, she knew, were the initials of her supposed soul mate, as determined by a higher power and inscribed on her skin with irreversible black ink.

She was the last of her siblings to receive the mark, having discovered it one arbitrary day in her seventeenth year over breakfast, by way of her sister noticing it through the swish of her ponytail and becoming absolutely obsessed. Yuzu had put a lot of stock into the ancient custom since a very young age, due to their brother Ichigo getting his when he was just fifteen and almost too easily finding his soulmate in his high school crush, who just happened to be the new transfer student. They had grown up on the story of how their parents met, instilling deep within them the value of this tradition, but once it began to happen around them in real time, Yuzu was completely sent over the edge, beside herself with anticipation.

Karin, on the other hand, denied any interest in the matter. She focused solely on her studies, her friends, and her youthful passion for sports. She took these values with her to university, yet left herself open to a few flings. Many of her fellow classmates were in the same boat as her, albeit for different reasons. Some lacked self-confidence and were too nervous to find their soulmate lest the dream reveal cracks, while others were wary of the commitment and either kept to themselves or sought out flings solely out of desire for connection without the strings. And of course, some were just plain rebellious, living for themselves and dating who they wanted whenever it suited them. Karin aligned herself with those of this mindset, riding waves of mutual attraction until their inevitable demise, until it was no longer fun and their relationship would begin to corrode.

It wasn't as though the connection wasn't there, that it wasn't real, it was simply that the fire would die, after a single night, or a few weeks, months, and although her sister argued that this was a testament to the mythology they were destined to live by, Karin remained adamant towards the contrary. She shrugged her failed romances off as 'just what happens,' claiming they were fun while they lasted.

Although, that wasn't entirely true. Before the dissolve came the rupture, the complications and the fights. The pain began to internalize within her, and by the end of her days in university, she had closed herself off completely. Now, in the wake of her twenty-fifth birthday, she added yet another romantic setback to the roster. It had been nearly three years since her last relationship ended, and she felt cheated. She had gone so long without feeling this way, and for what? Bad sex and crisp disillusionment.

She heaved a sigh, hugging her sweater to her chest as she looked determinedly up at the midnight sky. _I'll just be alone forever,_ she decided, sticking her tongue out and cursing whatever lay beyond the stars.

The walk home was fortunate and brief, landing Karin back at her apartment building in just twenty minutes. She then spent the entirety of her journey up the pathway rummaging through her bag for her keys. It was a very old rucksack that had acted as a sort of extra appendage since she was a teenager, and due to its age had many holes in the inner lining that made things impossible to find. She'd racked up quite a debt in bobby pins and chapsticks over the years, refusing to simply replace her beloved bag until the day it would finally disintegrate.

She grumbled, sorting through her belongings with a vigorous hand.

"You coming in?"

Karin's head shot up, the voice cutting through the stillness of the night and startling her. There was a man holding the door open ahead of her, and she was immediately put off by his sharp stare.

She cleared her throat, her bag falling limp in her grasp. "Er, yeah. Thanks."

He merely nodded, waiting until she had hold of the door before continuing toward the elevator. Karin followed suit.

"What floor?" she asked, entering the elevator closely behind him and finding herself on the side with the buttons.

"Four."

Pressing the button mechanically, Karin's face screwed up. They lived on the same floor.

As the elevator surged upward, she cast the man a curious look. His wild flock of silver hair garnered the most of her attention, his vivid turquoise eyes already embedded deep into her memory.

Surely she couldn't have overlooked someone with features so obtrusive.

"Are you new to the building?" she asked, her brow maintaining its furrow.

"No," he replied simply. "I moved in about three years ago."

A laugh escaped her, sounding very much like a timid croak. "Really? That's how long I've been living here… Well, my sister and I." He didn't so much as bat an eye at her rambling. She wrung her hands together. "Weird that I've never seen you around before."

"Not really," he said, his tone the exact embodiment of a shrug. "I've seen you plenty. But then, you're not the most observant person, are you?"

She blinked. "Uh…"

The doors dinged open, presenting a long and narrow hallway. Neither made a move to walk ahead of the other, which made Karin acutely aware of herself and the nerves that had begun to buzz along her skin like goosebumps. He, on the other hand, appeared completely unbothered and almost unnervingly stoic, his hands buried deep in the pockets of his slacks. Karin couldn't stop fidgeting, feeling unusually self-conscious; she regretted not cleaning herself up better before heading home.

She found herself committing his unit number to memory when he parted ways with her half way down the hall, and although he said nothing and she continued on, their eyes met once more before he disappeared into his apartment. His gaze was far softer in this moment, and just that much more mesmerizing.

With her cheeks flushed and burning, Karin hastened her pace to the end of the hall, fumbling with her keys to unlock the door. It was like she was being chased, the way she burst into her apartment and locked the door quickly behind her.

.

.

.

"Yuzu! Pancakes or waffles?!"

"Pancakes!"

Karin snorted, shaking her head. She shot her sister's boyfriend a look. "There's literally no difference," she told him, snacking on blueberries and chocolate chips from the spread in front of her.

"And _that_ is why you don't make breakfast," Shuhei said, pouring batter onto a sizzling frying pan. "You're alright with pancakes, then?"

She was caught up in her book again. "You know I prefer waffles."

Shuhei laughed.

"Have either of you seen my yellow slippers?" Yuzu called out, padding down the hallway towards the kitchen while she clipped a lock of honey-blonde hair back from her face. "I can't find them anywhere."

Shuhei regarded her briefly. "What's wrong with the ones on your feet?"

"Ah, they're all worn out now. The others are more comfy."

"I'll check my room after breakfast," Karin offered, her eyes not leaving her book as she sipped her coffee.

"Thanks," Yuzu said with a smile, joining her boyfriend in the cooking. "Where were you last night, by the way? Your text was very vague."

"I went out after work."

"Where to?"

Karin grimaced. "On a date, kind of."

"Oh, really?!" her sister pressed, lighting up. "With who? Was it possibly a date with–'

"No, it was not a date with fucking _initials_ ," Karin spat, letting her book fall shut. There was no point even trying to read now.

"I really don't understand why you bother," Yuzu wondered aloud, unfazed by her sister's outburst. "Honestly, how many failed relationships must you rack up before you finally give in?"

"Excellent question, Yuzu," Karin exclaimed. "As of last night, I have officially given up on love. I'm going to live out the rest of my days as a spinster and become a cautionary tale for future parents to tell their children."

Yuzu stood agape. "What? That's ridiculous."

"Is it?"

" _Um,_ yes!" Her sister was absolutely beside herself, brimming with concern. Karin braced herself for a lecture. "You're destined to be with someone, Karin! For all you know they're out there looking for you and you're not even giving them the time of day!"

"Do you know how common the initials 'H.T.' are? There was probably a miscount."

Shuhei tilted his head at this, appearing thoughtful. "Y'know, that _is_ a valid concern."

Yuzu huffed, smacking him on the arm. "There's no such thing as a miscount!" she damn near shrieked. Yuzu was a top tier advocate for soulmates and it was almost alarming. "There's different handwriting for a reason, you know. It guarantees that every person is valid."

"So I'm supposed to be looking around at bloody handwriting, too? That's way too much work."

Yuzu scoffed. "What do you think, put zero effort in and love will just present itself to you? And besides, it's not about the numbers or the facts, it's about a _feeling_. It's instinct."

Karin bit back a scowl, gritting her teeth. Why did her sister have to push this so hard at every opportunity? It was driving her insane.

"You don't get it, Yuzu. All you had to do was show up to your first culinary class and bam, there he was. Ichigo barely knew Rukia a week before they figured it out. And then fucking _mom and dad,_ their story is like a goddamn fairy tale."

"Don't exaggerate," Yuzu said. "We found each other because we were open to the idea, because we were actually _looking._ I mean, aren't you even the tiniest bit curious?"

"No, not really," Karin said dismissively. Her plate of waffles appeared before her then, and she made for the chocolate syrup and whipped cream. "I'm not saying I'm not happy for you guys, for all the people who find their 'soulmate' and live happily ever after and all that shit. I'm just saying… maybe it's not meant to be for everyone. Just because everybody _has_ a soulmate, it doesn't mean we're all going to find them. It's pretty implausible, if you ask me."

"Oh c'mon, Karin–'

"Can we just be over it, please?"

Yuzu and Shuhei exchanged looks; the air in the room had become hauntingly somber. Karin finished garnishing her waffles, the end result rather nauseating to the outside eye, and with her book under her arm and coffee mug in hand, she retreated to her bedroom. She ignored the resounding whispers that erupted in her wake.

She didn't need their concern, nor their pity.

.

.

.

She'd become rather despairing since breakfast, having spent the majority of her morning curled up on her bed with her book, averaging barely five pages an hour as an existential crisis brewed in her mind. The constant scatter of rain against her window only fueled the numbness.

She decided to leave for work early, desperate for a distraction from the dreaded subject of 'destiny' and her apparent lack of success in finding it. With an alarming amount of dry shampoo applied to her mess of hair and a quick swipe of mascara, Karin shoved her uniform and work shoes into her rucksack and headed out.

Yuzu and Shuhei were in the living room, her sister knitting idly as she caught up on her DVR while her boyfriend sat beside her, typing fervently. Shuhei was an editor for an online magazine, _Seireitei Weekly,_ which played host to personal stories and articles about people finding their soulmates, focusing wholly on the phenomenon. Karin stopped briefly at the coat closet for her rain jacket and umbrella, shoving her feet into her rubber boots as she gave them a rushed goodbye and left before either of them had a chance to wonder why she was leaving over an hour early.

Hitting the call button for the elevator, Karin dropped her bag to the floor and held the umbrella between her knees, donning her raincoat in the time it took for the elevator to arrive. And in doing so, as she took hold of her sweater sleeves and shot her arms out like wings in order to fix her coat properly, she failed to notice the person coming up behind her. Until, of course, her fist collided with their face, echoing a horrifying _smack._

"The hell–'

Karin spun around, so fast she nearly tripped over her own feet. "Oh my God, I am _so_ sorry! I didn't know you were there!"

"Why isn't that surprising?"

She gulped, meeting the same sharp gaze from the previous night, and not any more prepared to face him now than she was then. The way he looked at her set her on fire.

"Well, to be fair, you kinda came out of nowhere," Karin argued, picking up her things and entering the elevator. He followed her in, and she jabbed the button for the main floor. "Lobby?"

"Parkade," he corrected, massaging his jaw. It was splotched red.

Turning meek, she lightly pressed the 'P' button. "Sorry, again," she muttered, looking at the floor.

"Relax, it's not fatal."

Karin cast him a smirk. "This time, anyway."

"I'll keep a safe distance."

Quick as they had closed, the doors opened to the lobby and cut their time short. She wouldn't admit to herself that this bothered her, but it did. And of course, the rain had turned to an absolute downpour, thrashing against the building. Resigned to her fate, she headed for the exit, brandishing her umbrella.

"Are you going far?"

She paused, the soles of her boots squeaking against the linoleum. She glanced over her shoulder, where he was found with his hand pressed to the frame of the elevator, keeping the doors from closing. He raised his brows.

"Um, excuse me?"

"You're clearly planning to walk somewhere in this shitstorm," he said, his tone rather gruff. "Do you have far to go?"

Karin turned around, fidgeting with the handle of her umbrella. And she felt it again, the heat of his gaze. "Just to the bus stop," she told him, unusually nervous and straining to hide it. "I'm heading downtown for work."

"Do you want a ride?"

"Oh– no. I'm...I'm okay, thanks." He narrowed his eyes, and she prayed her face wasn't as red as it felt. "Really, it's fine. And I couldn't impose on you like that."

"But I'm offering," he said. It was clear that his patience had begun to thin. "I'm going downtown, anyway."

Karin bit her lip, looking back towards the exit, watching the rain thrash against the building. It was entirely unappealing. But then, so was accepting a ride from a total stranger, especially one who managed to make her feel this way simply by being present. She always made a point of listening to her gut, but in that moment she couldn't tell exactly what that was. As a backup plan, she kept with her stubbornness.

"I appreciate the offer, but really, I'm good." She cast him a meek smile, internally struggling with her resolve to decline. He appeared to be almost insulted, but as though he were trying very hard not to be. An awkward tension sparked between them. "Drive safe," she added, attempting to save face, inclining her head before turning back to the exit.

She didn't dare look back, feeling overcharged by the encounter and about ready to explode. To make matters worse, she was completely drenched by the time she reached the bus stop around the block, the wind having fought against her umbrella and blown the hood of her coat clean off her head. She regretted her choice to wear mascara, afraid to touch her face in the event that the 'waterproof' label had its limits and she made her possible raccoon eyes that much worse.

The bus was delayed, the route was slow due to both traffic and the weather, and by the time she arrived at the cafe it was nearly time to start her shift. The afternoon rush had yet to begin, and she relished the calm before the storm. She lingered in the dining area, closing her eyes and taking a relaxing breath.

"Well, don't you look nice."

Karin groaned, her eyes snapping open and landing on none other than that _same fucking guy_. She was beginning to regard her run-ins with him as a neverending nightmare. And of course, he was picture perfect.

"What are you doing here?" she snapped, feeling the flush of her cheeks and becoming even more annoyed. The way in which he smiled just made everything worse.

"My office is across the street," he told her, indicating his coffee cup. "Your shop is conveniently close."

"You're a regular," she conceded, a slight bit amused by this, in a twisted sort of way. "And let me guess, 'you've seen me plenty.'"

He shrugged. "In all fairness, you're usually busy when I come in. Sometimes you're not even here."

"Thanks," she said dismally. "Makes me feel loads better."

She was about to ask what he did for work, but was steered clear by the sudden appearance of her boss. He had come from behind the counter, to-go cup in hand, leaving on his typical mysterious errand right before they got busy. She knew he was coming by the sound of his wooden clogs.

"Karin, you're absolutely soaked!" he accosted, hiding his amusement behind his fan. "Did you arrive by boat?"

Karin groaned, closing her eyes as she massaged her temples. "I have to get ready," she muttered, giving neither man any more of her time and heading straight towards the back of the shop.

.

He returned later that night, while Karin swept the floors before closing time, and she had to resist the urge to whack him in the shins.

"Isn't it a bit late for coffee?"

"Never." She rolled her eyes, and he smirked. "Actually, I'm just here to offer you a drive home."

"You don't give up, do you?"

"I will after this."

It was a statement, spoken firmly, and it actually made her upset. Her stomach did a flip, and she faltered.

"I'm not off for another twenty minutes," she told him, sticking to her stubborn guns with a classic non-answer.

"I think I can pass the time," he said coolly. "I'll meet you outside."

Karin stood agape as she watched him leave, a conflict of emotion warring inside her.

.

It had stopped raining hours ago, the night surprisingly cool despite it being the middle of summer, and as promised, Karin found him waiting outside. He leaned against the side of his car, one hand in his pocket while the other held his phone, illuminating his scowl as he scrolled. He looked up reflexively as she approached, his expression going soft in an instant, and she hated how weak it made her. He was annoyingly attractive.

They drove with the windows down, and Karin filled the time venting to him about her shift.

"The Sunday crowds are the worst of them," she insisted, talking about a mile a minute. He listened intently, engaging her rants without inhibition, only taking his eyes off the road during stop lights. It took until they had arrived home for her to realize how much she'd talked, and by extension how little she'd asked about him, and she was genuinely bummed when the car switched off.

"Thanks for the drive," she said, walking alongside him to the elevator. "And for not taking me to some remote location and murdering me."

"You're not in the clear yet," he warned. "For all you know this is just a clever ruse to gain your trust."

"You're right, I'm probably so unobservant I've been missing all the signs," she conceded, looking around them. "Is this even our building? I actually wasn't paying attention."

He frowned. "You concern me."

Karin flashed him a smile, skipping ahead to the elevator and pressing the call button. He just shook his head, mild amusement fixing his face as he followed her into the elevator.

"I'm Karin, by the way," she told him, realizing with a flush of embarrassment that she'd been so caught up in her rant on the way home that she still hadn't introduced herself. "Kurosaki Karin."

"Good to know…" He glanced at her briefly. "I'm, uh… Hitsugaya Toushirou."

She hardly noticed his hesitance, simply nodding in response. She gazed aimlessly around at the stainless steel walls. _Hitsugaya Toushirou,_ his name rang in her mind. _Hitsugaya Toushirou. H…T…_

The elevator dinged, and Karin couldn't step out into the hallway fast enough, drowning the urge to vomit. It had hit her like a brick, a swell of anxiety erupting in her chest.

"Karin?" Toushirou stood just behind her, his brow wrinkled, a confused frown fixing his face. "Are you okay?"

"The initials," she said, breathing out slowly. She turned to face him, her heart thrashing wildly. "On the back of your neck, what are they?"

He might've been amused by this, or annoyed. She couldn't quite tell.

"Kind of a pointless question, isn't it?"

She gaped at him. "You already knew, didn't you?"

He shrugged. "I had a hunch."

"For how long?"

"A while," he said simply. "I noticed your name on the intercom after I moved in. And also…"

He drifted off, and she narrowed her eyes. "And _what?_ "

Toushirou frowned, averting his gaze. "Well," he started, uncertain. She was at least comforted by the fact that he was losing composure. "I saw you, once. You were leaving your apartment as I was just coming home, and you were talking on the phone. I heard you laugh, and I looked… And I knew. Then I saw you everywhere."

Karin flushed. "What...What do you mean, you ' _knew_?' That doesn't– And also– _Yuzu's_ name is on the intercom, too. How could you tell who was who?"

"Well, I couldn't. Obviously." He was back on his bullshit, and she glared at him. "I didn't know your name until tonight. Not for certain, anyway. And to be honest I wasn't that concerned about it."

"The fuck does _that_ mean?" Karin seethed, a cruel cocktail of emotions blazing through her. "You've known for years that we could possibly be each other's soulmates and couldn't be _bothered_ to say anything?!"

"It's not like I didn't think about it! It's just that you seemed a bit… Preoccupied."

"'Preoccupied'?" she repeated, as though the definition evaded her.

"You didn't really seem to be looking," he elaborated, but still failed to hit the mark. She furrowed her brow, and he sighed, aghast. "We've crossed paths several times over the past few years, and not once have you ever looked in my direction. It's actually concerning how little you notice what's happening around you."

"Well _sorr-y_ for not fawning over you at every opportunity," she fumed. He rolled his eyes. "It's not my fault you never said anything! You could've done _something–!"_

"What do you expect? I wasn't gonna go knock on your door and be like 'Hey how's it going I think we're soulmates' like some twit."

"Whynot?!" she shouted, throwing her arms up in exasperation. "It would've been a lot more effective than sitting on your ass for three years waiting to be noticed!"

"Right, because my only concern in life is your fucking recognition," he cut back, miffed. "I have a life, if you didn't notice. Which I'm sure you didn't because you clearly have the attention span of an infant."

Karin gritted her teeth, leaving him stunted as she began to stalk down the hallway. He was quick to catch up with her.

"I didn't want to force it, alright? I've always thought this kind of thing needed to happen naturally." He stammered, trying to regain proper footing. "For a while I was sure I'd gotten it wrong… Until last night."

"Don't you think you're projecting a bit," she said loftily, disregarding him as she began to rummage in her bag for her keys. Toushirou scoffed.

"No, but you sure seem keen on avoiding me now."

"I was taught to be wary of stalkers." He got to her apartment door before she did, regarding her with full force and leaving her winded. "Have you considered I might not like you like that?" she said now, changing tactics.

"No," he said, dismissing the notion entirely. Karin rolled her eyes, continuing to tear her rucksack apart. "Admit it, Karin, you felt something when we met, and before you knew what my name was you were attracted to me."

"Someone's a bit high on themselves," she mocked, finally giving up on the search for her keys and resorting to knocking on the door.

Toushirou leaned against the wall, persistent. "You're not even the slightest bit curious if we're a match?"

"I don't believe in that stuff," she told him candidly, though severely lacking conviction. She was merely arguing for the sake of it, so resigned to her beliefs it was hard to determine whether she'd truly changed her mind. "I mean, sure, I'll admit that you're attractive. I'm not blind. But I think the whole soulmate thing is bogus, and whether we're a 'match' or not really makes no difference to me."

His determined expression went slack, taken aback. "Are you serious?"

She didn't have a chance to answer before the door opened, revealing a wake-stricken Yuzu in her pyjamas, squinting confusedly in the light. "Karin?"

"Sorry, Yu," Karin muttered, stepping inside. "I forgot my keys."

"It's so late," Yuzu grumbled, rubbing her eyes. She blinked owlishly at the man in the hallway. "Who are you?"

Toushirou straightened up, expectant as he looked to Karin. However, she ignored him, keeping her back turned.

"Figment of your imagination," he replied flatly, the cold finality in his voice sending a shiver down her spine.

She glanced over her shoulder, but he was already gone.

.

.

.

Karin couldn't sleep that night, her mind overrun with thought and refusing to shut down. She tossed and turned and damn near screamed into her pillow out of frustration. When dawn broke she gave up on sleep entirely, instead reaching for her phone. Embarrassed for herself, she brought up Seiretei Weekly, and spent the next hour and a half reading a backlog of other people's love stories. The further down she went, the more unreal it all felt. Like fairytales, happily ever afters, fictional love. She didn't understand why she couldn't accept it. Was she just too cynical? Did she do this to herself? At what point did she write herself off. She couldn't recall.

It was no longer fun to pretend she didn't care. If she were honest with herself, it never was.

It hit her like a surge of electricity, and she tossed her phone aside, hopping out of bed and going to her closet. She sorted through her closet for something to wear, wanting to look her casual best at eight a.m. on a Sunday morning. She washed her face and brushed her hair, wearing a light mask of makeup and a ponytail. In her best jeans and a red top, she checked her appearance in the full length mirror, talking herself up in her head. She pulled her sleeves over her knuckles anxiously, heart racing as she made her way through the apartment. _Just keep going_ , she told herself, over and over. She'd never been so nervous about a guy in her entire life. Given the circumstance, it was laughable.

Outside his door, she paced. Back and forth, head down, hands patting her sides like a drum. She kept making to knock, but would stop herself, resume pacing. She didn't know what she should say. A part of her worried that he might be angry with her, hurt by her previous rejection. She couldn't be sure, and she wanted to run away.

"Can I help you?"

Her nerves seized, and she inhaled sharply. Turning round on the spot, she came face to face with Toushirou. He looked at her intently, brow raised, and she stammered.

"Um, hi," she chirped, sounding so unlike herself. Her face fixed with confusion, and she looked from him to the door and back again. "You were supposed to be home."

"Morning run."

"Ah." She regarded him fully then, his sweat drenched hair and t-shirt, sweatpants and runners. "Right…"

"You wanna come in?" he asked, lacking apprehension.

She smiled, feeling a surge of relief. "Yes, please."

He moved to unlock the door, opening it wide as he entered so she could follow. His apartment was different from hers, a bit smaller and more open concept. The kitchen was the same, though, and she took a seat at the island with a sense of familiarity. Toushirou had already downed a glass of water, and he leaned back against the adjacent counter, crossing his arms over his chest. He looked at her expectantly, and she bit her lip, struggling to maintain eye contact.

"So, what's up?"

"I wanted to apologize," she said, doing her best to look him in the eye. "I was just thrown off, and… I said some things I didn't mean."

"And what things did you mean?"

Karin grew meek, unsure how to answer. By the way looked at her, she got the impression he wasn't going to let her off easy.

"I don't really know," she told him honestly. It was lame, but it felt true. "The whole soulmate thing, I don't really know why I don't like it...I just know I've spent the last eight years of my life running from it."

She sighed, leaning back in her chair, hugging herself. She didn't like talking about this, having always avoided the topic, avoided being too real.

"Maybe… Maybe it's because my mom died." She took a breath, feeling the impact of her words only as she said them. "She and my dad were soulmates, like, true to the script. They were perfect for eachother, and so happy, and she died anyway. And now my dad is alone. For twenty years now, he's never been with anyone else. And that's not fair."

Toushiro shifted, cupping his chin with his hand, stroking his jaw. He was looking down at the floor, pensieve.

"My aunt lost her soulmate, too," he said, a delicate tone of sadness in his voice. "They met when they were kids, but he disappeared for a long time. When they met again as adults, things were complicated, and before long he was gone again. For good. Their love was little more than pain, with so much other stuff getting in the way… It's enough to make anyone cynical."

"Are you?"

He glanced at her, tilting his head to the side. "At times," he said, thoughtful. Then he smiled. "Right now, though, I'm just hungry."

She blinked, her brow furrowed. He leaned over, resting his elbows on the countertop, facing her straight on. "Wanna get breakfast?"

Karin flushed, not expecting this turn of conversation but quickly becoming grateful for it. She made a face, acting coy. "I _do_ like breakfast…"

"Good. My treat, then," he said, decisive. "Give me twenty minutes."

Then he was off, disappearing through a door she assumed led to the bathroom, the sound of the shower starting not long after. He hadn't told her to leave, and within a moment's contemplation, Karin gave in to her desire to snoop. It was a weird day already, not even ten o'clock yet, and she wanted a distraction from her mind. Looking around, though, there was little to catch the eye. The place was fairly bare and impersonal, the kitchen looking like it had never seen a home-cooked meal, while the living room was little more than a sofa and a television. There was a bookshelf in the far corner, and she went there first.

It was mostly filled with non-fiction books, quite a few legal aid and law volumes leading her to assume he was a lawyer.

 _How boring,_ she thought. At the same time, however, she supposed it was fitting, and she smiled to herself. _No wonder he's so serious… And arrogant._

On one of the shelves was a single picture frame. Toushiro appeared to be years younger in the photo, alongside a tall and robust redhead and a small dark-haired girl with soft eyes. None of them looked remotely alike, but they seemed like a family. Karin wondered if the redhead was his aunt.

She paced around for a bit, gravitating slowly towards the bedroom. It was the only other space to inspect, and she couldn't help it. The door was slightly ajar, and she nudged it open with her foot, passing through the threshold with careful steps.

It was a far nicer bedroom than her own, with a bigger bed and a better view out the window. From her own window she just saw more buildings, while his allowed at least a narrow view of the water. There were two bedside tables, one with a lamp and alarm clock, the other housing a laptop with a pair of reading glasses folded on top. Other than that, the room was completely void of clutter, no mess of belongings or dirty clothes on the floor. It made her embarrassed for how messy her own room was.

Again, she supposed it was fitting.

Distracted, as was her plan, she didn't notice the shower go silent, only snapping to attention when a door behind her clicked and began to open. She sprinted from the room as quick as she could, keeping her back turned away as she clasped her hands together and stood awkwardly in the middle of the living room. She heard the scrape of clothes hangers, how he rummaged through the closet. She bit her lip, staring determinedly at the ceiling.

"Keeping busy?"

Karin jumped, turning around to find him smirking. He leaned against the door frame, rolling up his sleeves. She was beginning to like the way he looked at her.

"I wasn't snooping," she told him.

"Of course not," he agreed, blatantly accepting her lies.

He began to move around, collecting his wallet and his keys, briefly checking his phone. She fell into a trance as she watched him, engulfed in longing and adoration. It was like nothing she'd ever felt.

"Do you need anything from your place?" he asked, bringing her back to the present. Immediately, she gasped.

"Oh, shit. Yuzu!"

She hurried from one apartment to the other, hoping to find Yuzu and Shuhei still asleep so she wouldn't have to explain.

"Karin, is that you!" her sister called the moment she entered the apartment, and Karin deflated, heart racing from her sprint. Yuzu poked her head out from the kitchen. "Where were you? You didn't take your phone."

"Yeah, sorry, I wasn't thinking." She didn't spare the time for conversation, darting to her room for her things and then straight back to the door. She would tell her sister about Toushirou, of course. _Later._ "I'm going out for a bit!"

"Wait, Karin–'

Both girls stopped dead in their tracks when the door opened to reveal Toushirou, lingering idly in the hallway. Karin inwardly groaned, while Yuzu came up beside her, fixed with curiosity.

"Who's this?"

Karin planted herself in the middle, attempting to mask her grimace. " _Yuzu_ , this is Toushirou. He lives down the hall."

He flicked his wrist in a wave. "Hey."

Yuzu's brow furrowed. "Have we met?"

"Sort of."

"Alright, well, we should get going," Karin interjected, making to grab Toushirou's arm and drag him away. But her sister was persistent.

"Wait, your name's Toushirou?"

"Hitsugaya Toushirou," he confirmed.

Almost instantaneously, Yuzu's face lit up with recognition, her jaw dropping in awe. Karin just moaned.

"Please, Yuzu, don't start," she begged.

Yuzu grinned in sly. "I'm saying nothing," she said, putting a hand to her lips. Karin just rolled her eyes. "You two have fun~"

The door closed and they were left alone again, starting back down the hall.

"Keeping me a secret, are you?" he teased.

She made a face. "Avoiding a smug 'I told you so,' more like."

Her phone chimed before they even made it to the elevator.

_From Yuzu: He's SOOO cute!_

And again.

_From Yuzu: I told you so!_

.

Halfway through breakfast, Karin's lack of rest caught up with her. Adrenaline depleted, she began to doze.

"You okay?"

She grinned sleepily, holding her head up by the palm of her hand. "I didn't sleep much," she admitted. "Or at all, actually."

Toushirou smirked. "Too hung up on me? I'm touched."

Karin rolled her eyes. "As a matter of fact," she drawled. Then, it began to hit her again, what was truly happening, and she felt herself grow serious. She gazed at him intently. "You scare me."

He remained gentle, tender as he held her gaze, and her heart swelled.

"You scare me, too."

.

.

.

The next few months passed in a blur, and already winter was upon them, and Karin was reeling.

She laid in bed, wide awake and buzzing, while Toushirou slept soundly beside her. She had just come off her fourth night shift in a row, while he was recovering from a sixty hour work week, sex having been the last nail in his coffin. Now, in the barely there light of the moon and city glow coming through the window, she paid him her full attention. She felt giddy, an onset of emotions filling her up.

It still managed to baffle her, at times. The idea of soulmates, of the two of them being destined. Her cynical side would flare on occasion, on the days that things weren't perfect, when they argued about how much he worked, how distracted she could be. He never raised his voice, while she had a hard time staying even. Alone in her head, she would spiral, oftentimes comparing their dating histories, how little he had bothered to dabble in feeble relationships, how she might've dabbled too much. Perhaps it had left her damaged, too used to the toxic side of things. She feared it would seep in between them. But he was resolute, and the more time passed the easier it became to believe.

It had taken her a while to learn to be open, to accept that he had a different way of communicating, to not be on constant guard for the drama that wouldn't come. She realized that conflict was a part of life, and that despite the fates, nothing was built perfect. And that was okay.

She felt so certain now. So content. As time passed, these things made her less anxious. The fear that she'd lose them fell away.

His presence was like a natural high, calming and visceral. It's how she could lay there, trailing her fingertips along his skin, smiling to herself as she imagined their life together, the future feeling a lot less blurry and full of possibilities.

In his sleep he grumbled, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her close. He didn't wake, and she brushed the hair from his face, planting a kiss on his cheek. And at times like these, when she really let herself feel it, the extent of which she truly loved him, it was enough to bring her to tears. She felt it with her entire soul, flowing throughout her entire body, so much so that it was almost painful.

And she trusted it.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic has been sitting in my drafts for YEARS. I definitely liked the concept more than the follow through, so if it felt quickly tied up that's because IT WAS. But I do hope you all enjoyed! I've been wanting to post this for so long. I remember editing it last spring when it was like 60% done, really loving the scenes I'd written, desperate to come up with an ending so I could share it. My fanfiction bug has faded quite a lot, but I still have a soft spot for it, esp HitsuKarin, and my love for Bleach is eternal.
> 
> Also it's become a habit of mine to pair Yuzu with Hisagi in my AUs and I don't really know how that happened. I think I just really love Hisagi and need an excuse to add him to things. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Anyway, drop a review/fav, tell me what ya think. I for one wish soulmate ink existed, and would do the opposite of Karin and just avoid relationships completely until I found my confirmed person. Life would be easier.
> 
> Title of story comes from lyrics: Who Knows Who Cares by Local Natives


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